(Norman High Logo from NHS Website)
It's half-time and we're down by six. Coach is hollering about teamwork. We are disjointed, not playing as a team, and I'm not focused. He's yelling at me now but all I can think about is her smile. Even though we are losing she rallies the cheerleaders on our behalf. She's cheering for me, I know it. No, Arjuna, focus dammit! We have to win, if we don't she won't be cheering for me and I'll lose my chance.
Thirty seconds left on the clock. Sweat is dripping into my eyes and my mouth is dry. I look for my receiver, he's trying to shake his coverage. I look downfield and weigh my options. I'm running out of time. I've gotta pass. My receiver shakes his man and I make my pass just before one of the guys from North takes out my legs. I fall and my head bounces off the turf. I don't know if my throw connected but I hear cheers from the crowd. I can't believe it. Holy shit, we won.
 |
| (North Logo from NNHS Website) |
Thank god this game is over. I'm hungry and I'd like to change out of this uniform. Cheering is my passion but I hate football. So brutish. Oh, Arjuna is heading this way, I wonder if he'll actually talk to me this time. He is so cute but he always stutters when he tries to talk to me.
"Hey, uh-ummm, so we just won!" he stutters.
"Yeah, I saw that. Great pass! Bet it feels good to win your last High/North" I answer, not sure where this conversation is going, but at least he's making semi-coherent words this time.
"Draupadi, listen, I have liked you for a long time but you make me nervous and I never know what to say. But winning today showed me that anything is possible if I work hard enough. Winning today was not about the game, not about football, you are my ultimate prize. Will you go out with me?" the words came rushing out of him in a barely intelligible torrent. But she heard the word prize associated with her name.
"Prize?! Are you kidding, Arjuna? I've thought you were cute since the 8th grade but you'd never talk to me. But I want you to know this. I am no one's prize. I may have said yes if you hadn't commodified me into some trophy. Sorry, Arjuna, but no; I will not go out with you." Unbelievable.
"Come on girls, Ihop anyone?" I say as I turn and walk away from a stunned Arjuna. I will not be anyone's prize.
Author's Note: I took my inspiration from a section of the Mahābhārata - Retold by Kṛṣṇa Dharma. It tells the story of Arjuna winning Draupadi in a contest. He then brings her home to his mother and brothers. His mother accidentally tells him that the five brothers must share the prize without knowing that she is speaking of a woman. Once she finds out she is worried for she is pious and must not be touched by sin. It is eventually decided that all five brothers will take Draupadi as their wife. It cannot be a sin if it is supported by a sage as powerful as Vyāsadeva, which it is.
In my retelling I set my story in modern times and made Arjuna a high school football player. I really wanted to give Draupadi the agency that she is lacking in the original story. I made Draupadi a cheerleader and an object of Arjuna's desire. He thinks that by winning the football game he will also win Draupadi, but as you can see from reading it, she isn't having it. I just modernized the tale and set it during the High/North football game because I graduated from Norman High and remember how big of a deal that game is to highschoolers. It also made it more relatable and entertaining. I kept my football terms general as to not alienate any readers who may not be sports people - I get football/sports terms but many people don't so I tried to avoid it and speak in generalities. I also told the story from two perspectives so Draupadi has a voice. In the original story she doesn't. I also thought the split persepective would make it interesting to read.
Bibliography: Mahabharata: The Greatest Spiritual Epic of All Time. Krishna Dharma (2008).
I also took issue in my retelling of Draupadi's story (I zeroed in on the whole husband gambling her away thing) with the fact that she had no voice. Well, in my story, she has a voice, but she also takes action (the action of getting away!).
ReplyDeleteHey Erika! I really like how you’ve modernized this story and made it more relatable. I’ve had an issue with women in the Mahabharata and Ramayana being disrespected or not having a voice. So, I’m really glad that Draupadi stood up for herself and her thoughts and feelings were important to the story. Draupadi went through a lot of crap in the Mahabharata, so she deserves some justice for sure. Very nice job!
ReplyDeleteErika, I liked that you had both the characters share their point-of-view in the story. After I read Arjun part, I thought the story was over, but then we were able to learn what was happening from Draupadi side. I was also surprised and proud when Draupadi said she did not appreciate Arjun calling her a prize. It helped bring the story to a more modern theme with an empowered woman. Personally, I think is an essential concept in stories. Great story, I hope I can come back to read some more of them!
ReplyDeleteHello Erika, really great story. I liked how you related the story not only to football, but also the city of Norman. I thought the original story was really great retold in your setting. I really liked how you updated the characters like making draupadi a cheerleader and Arjun a player. You also did good at merging the personality of the original character with values and actions that would work in a modern high school.
ReplyDelete